ShakespeareanTragedy

For all my blog writing, I cannot seem to write an analytical paragraph in English Honors for moufflets.

We had ten paragraphs to write about Romeo and Juliet. Each was out of fifty points.

Paragraph #1: 37/50 - C
Oh well. I'll do better next time.

Paragraph #2: 37/50 - C
Hmm. This stinks. Third time will be the charm.

Paragraph #3: 37/50 - C
Okay. This isn't funny.

Paragraph #4: N/A
This was a rather good one, but apparently I forgot to turn it in to Turnitin.com. O I am Fortune's fool. Oh well. At least I improved, right?

Paragraph #5: 37/50 - C
What the hey! I didn't improve at all! You're kidding me! What the bloody hey do you mean by analyzed? What's there to analyze! And it's not speculating. It's flipping obvious. Anyone with the tiniest shred of common sense would be able to tell! Are you so stupid that I have to explain!

Paragraph #6: 40/50 - B
Well that's a change. Maybe I'll get an A next time. B's aren't good enough for me.

Paragraph #7: 37/50 - C
This is getting really discouraging. I tried really, really hard not to speculate and analyzed and explained everything, or so I thought. Maybe the teacher has something against me. Everyone else is doing better. Maybe I really am a failure.

Paragraph #8: 39/50 - C
We wrote this one in class, and the teacher graded easier. Some people said a lot easier. Well, gee that makes me feel a lot better. On the other hand, I did write something that usually takes over a day in less than an hour. We have to self analyze this. It's probably officially hopeless now. No way of pulling off an A this semester. And to think I actually went against my motto of being efficient for these stupid things. More depression...woe is me...

Paragraph #9: 41/50 - B
I have come across a very important discovery. English paragraphs do not follow the laws of physics!. The Law of Conservation of Energy states that energy is neither created nor destroyed. When doing work, the energy you put into it is turned into a state of energy known as a grade. The more energy applied the greater the grade. However, where English is concerned, even if you put a very large amount of energy into a paragraph, you still end up with a rather low grade. I spent a quarter of an Earth rotation only to get a B minus!

Paragraph #10: 40/50 - B
Conclusive evidence that English defy physics. I stayed up until twelve o'clock in order to write 356 words, and I only get an eighty percent!?! This is ridiculous!

Bet even Shakespeare himself couldn't write a story of more woe than the one I'm facing right now. On the other hand, he did cause my piteous overthrows.

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